I wonder if you are reading this or not.
If you are, I’m not surprised at all. ;)
But if you are not, I’m not surprised either. ^^
I miss you.
I don’t want to email you this.
And it took me some time to decide whether to post it here.
Putting it here is not comfortable. I have to accept the fact that you may not read it, but more likely, the girl(s) might. I don’t want them to think that I’m vying with them for your love. You know my character. I’ve never involved myself in such competition, and I have no intention of competing with them. The only one I care about is you.
I write this just because I am happy to still feel that : I love you.
But that I love you this time is not filled with desperate tears or weakness. It comes with strength, and a smile.
I can somehow understand your choice and worries... I know you don’t choose the girl(s), you just choose the easier life.
But you are fully aware that it involves being with her and leaving me, or losing me, maybe forever..., aren't you ?
I want to hate you for your choice, I want to hate you for your betrayal, I want to hate you for causing me all the pain, grief, disappointment, and all the heartbreak that no one ever wants to go through...
But I can't, and I don’t.
...
To me, you are more a silly & soon discouraged guy than a bad guy.
I always want to hold you tight and forgive you for everything…
Actually, I forgave you long ago.
I miss you. But I choose to let you go.
I want you to go and choose to be with the one that you feel happy and really want to be with.
You may be surprised, and I am surprised too :) by how I feel now.
I don’t know why, and what makes me feel it this way. Badly hurt, wounded in fact, I still somehow feel it - our love - it is still here, very close, deep in our hearts, ready to flare up whenever it has a chance to...
But how can it wake up if things keep going on like this? i don't know.
You may feel relieved and happy to know that now I am moving on.
I choose to forget all the negative feelings and forget all the pain. Because there’s always something else larger than pain inside. I guess you know what it is ^^ .
I choose to be happy. I must be loving but rational. I should and will only think of us when you are committed, when you choose to be faithful to me.
One more thing, it may sound funny, but to be honest, now I’m confident and happy also because I’ve come to realize how rich and beautiful I am :)
. That ‘rich and beautiful’ refers more to the heart.
The melody of this song naturally comes to my mind as I'm writing this...
Do you get what you're hoping for?
When cropping this photo, I just smile and remember how we resemble each other in our smiles.
“You want me 2, don’t you?” hiiii
:D, and this is the last time I say : this is the last time I write about this topic.
But I can't, and I don’t.
...
To me, you are more a silly & soon discouraged guy than a bad guy.
I always want to hold you tight and forgive you for everything…
Actually, I forgave you long ago.
I miss you. But I choose to let you go.
I want you to go and choose to be with the one that you feel happy and really want to be with.
You may be surprised, and I am surprised too :) by how I feel now.
I don’t know why, and what makes me feel it this way. Badly hurt, wounded in fact, I still somehow feel it - our love - it is still here, very close, deep in our hearts, ready to flare up whenever it has a chance to...
But how can it wake up if things keep going on like this? i don't know.
You may feel relieved and happy to know that now I am moving on.
I choose to forget all the negative feelings and forget all the pain. Because there’s always something else larger than pain inside. I guess you know what it is ^^ .
I choose to be happy. I must be loving but rational. I should and will only think of us when you are committed, when you choose to be faithful to me.
One more thing, it may sound funny, but to be honest, now I’m confident and happy also because I’ve come to realize how rich and beautiful I am :)
. That ‘rich and beautiful’ refers more to the heart. The melody of this song naturally comes to my mind as I'm writing this...
“Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?
Do you get what you're hoping for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hoping for?
Do you know?
Once we were standing still in time
Chasing the fantasies that filled our minds
You knew i loved you, but my spirit was free
Laughing at the question that you once asked me
Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?
Now, looking back in all we pass
We've let so many dreams just slip through our hands
Why must we wait so long before we see
How sad the answers to those questions can be?
Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?
Do you get what you're hoping for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hoping for? do you know...?”
When cropping this photo, I just smile and remember how we resemble each other in our smiles.
“You want me 2, don’t you?” hiiii
:D, and this is the last time I say : this is the last time I write about this topic.
I'm happy to see you happy. Keep smiling. LOVE YOU
ReplyDeleteHe is an unlucky guy to lose a girl like you, i think :)
ReplyDeleteLove the way you are confident about yourself, about how beautiful you are :D
Be more confident and happy, my friend (^_^)
P/S: Reply tiếng Anh cho "Giáo viên Anh Văn" thấy hơi lo lo, keke ^^, có lỗi gì thì correct giùm nhé Thy :D
@ Uyên : năm nay dạy trúng lớp tụi em thiệt... tội nghiệp cô quá :D Bữa h chỉ có mỗi cái vụ lịch học mà thật mệt mỏi và mất thời gian của cô kinh khủng. hết sức khó chịu cái vụ xếp lịch học của trường, khai giảng trễ hơn mọi năm mà lại không điều chỉnh thời gian cho phù hợp, kết thúc đột ngột, cũng không báo trước với gv, rồi thì bắt gv phải viết đơn từ giải trình xin hội trường này nọ nếu muốn dạy đủ tiết. Mà cô thì không ưa đơn từ nên không định viết mà định dạy chui rút lại để tụi em thtrình cho xong :<. Khổ nỗi cũng chả biết cái lịch thi của tụi em chính xác là bữa nào để mà dạy, phản ảnh lên hỏi tới hỏi lui mấy lần thì trên đó kêu đổi rồi mà vẫn không trả lời cụ thể là đổi sang thi buổi nào. Thời gian xếp chồng chéo mất buổi liên tục, rồi h lại thêm cái lịch thể dục gì đấy cũng không thông báo với mình blah blah blah, thú thật, cô cũng chả có cảm hứng gì để dạy tiếp. Không vì còn nhóm thtrình chắc cô cũng cho nghỉ luôn rồi. Nhưng đổi lại, thấy mình cũng may mắn khi có cơ hội được biết một sv ngoan , giỏi và dễ thương như em.
ReplyDelete@ foronereason: Hic. "giáo viên AV" gì, nghe nó ngại quá đi T_T, cái phần phía trên T viết nhiều khi cũng tùm lum lỗi :P , có gì đâu ^^.
Thank you for your kind words.
Hihi trường mình xếp lịch lộn xộn có tiếng mà cô, haizz khiến cô đau đầu rồi, tự dưng em cũng thấy áy náy quá chỉ vì tụi em chưa thuyết trình.
ReplyDeleteCô reply giúp em zụ kia được không cô? Em cảm ơn cô nhiều.
P/S: Cô đừng lo nhiều kẻo ảnh hưởng tới nhan sắc nha cô.
You know, my beloved teacher, we have something in common. Even though my ex-girlfriend & I have broken up for 11 months, I still cannot get over her. And you know, after reading your entry, I am now thinking of her, which makes me emotional. I don't blame you for that, I blame myself for being too weak to clear my head and leave the past behind. It was a long time ago, but it's still haunting me, like a ghost, you know? Wish I could be strong like you.
ReplyDeleteAnd besides, I'm confident that I sing the song "Do you know where you're going to" pretty well, perhaps I can sing it for you someday :D
@Uyên: hi, đâu có gì áy này đâu em, ý cô nói trường mình thôi. Với lại cô cũng ko có lo nhiều đâu. Em yên tâm :P Em nói cô reply vụ gì ? Vụ ăn chơi cuối năm? Nếu vụ ăn chơi đó thì cô nhớ cô reply rồi mà :P. Học xong tính tiếp ^^, trên tinh thần welcome tụi em ;P
ReplyDelete@Minh: Thank you for sharing your story with me Minh. I guess I know how you feel. I have been there, and maybe I am still there :P. I'm not that strong ;) But we just need to be happy, thankful and embrace life. :)
PS: wow, so when is that great “someday”? ;D
làm sớm sớm nha cô, em về quê sớm :(
ReplyDeletebún thịt xào nha cô ;;)
[giờ plan là vừa :D]
uhm, vậy để gửi message em sau.
ReplyDeleteCmt entry này chấm dứt tại đây nhe ;). Thật ra là bữa up quên tắt cmt :P.
thật ko dễ để đối mặt với vấn đề này, mình cũng đang trải qua khoảng thời gian khó khăn này giống như bạn.Đọc được những gì bạn viết phần nào an ủi giúp mình vượt qua được khó khăn lúc này!!! Cười lên đi bạn nhé ;)
ReplyDeleteNever frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile (:D